i wrote this 5 months ago in one of my notes on facebook, and since i haven’t had the brain juice to put something serious on the blog lately, here’s a chunk of my previously juiced brain cells…
enjoy! — jean :)
“..No one could ever like, respect, or accept me! I don’t deserve to be treated nicely! People are just nice to you in order to use you and get something they want from you! I am so afraid that no one will like me! I can never accomplish the task facing me! I am an incomplete person and will always be that way! Why would anyone care to hear what I say, how I feel, or what I think? What is the sense of trying, I’ll never get it right! Everybody is looking at me, just waiting for me to make a fool of myself! I can never win. I am a loser. No matter how hard I work to achieve, I never get any recognition!
I am incompetent in everything. How could anybody ever say anything good about me?
I failed them in the past; therefore, I am a failure today!
Once a failure, always a failure!”
If you felt a pinch reading the above statements, you might be chronically insecure. Lots of people around us are. They live their lives restrained by their own, self-imposed limitations. They set standards for themselves, as what they deem ought to be ideal. Is this further aggrevated by the unmotivating society we live in? Or is it simply an inferiority complex within us?
All living beings seek security, we are all born with the power of fear, inbuilt in us. We require constant reassurance, a nod as a sign of approval, or as a green light to proceed in the things we do. Without that assurance that what we are dabbling in is correct, we are open to a higher possibility and fear of failing in goals and tasks. We need to bridge that gap of insecurity. We fear FAILURE in our future endeavours; while some fear that the past will repeat itself, a past of previous failures.Indeed, the level of security we can gather from our environment, and the amount of self-confidence we have in ourselves pretty much determines the way we live.
Thus, we seek all ways and means to avoid failure, by which suggests the avoidance of pain. Now, we all refer to PROCRASTINATION as an act of deferment of a certain action.
But as defined by life success coach John Kanary,
PROCRASTINATION is the acceptance of a life that we don’t want to avoid the pain we must go through to have the life that we do want.
GUILTY? think about it, many of us are indeed daily procrastinaters! why settle for 2nd place, when you can be the best? it’s time to curb those fears & insecurities… but, HOW? In the bid to increase our self-worth, some may find the need to surround themselves with lots of people, not necessarily friends, but acquaintances no doubt. They may gain a sense of satisfaction, knowing that there are people who care.
The feeling of being popular, the feeling of being WANTED. EGO BOOST GUYS? But, how much can we gain from a SUPERFICIAL sense of SECURITY? yes, the hottest guy around may not necessarily be secure. He may have a whole school of girls to choose from; he may be the role model or even idol of his “not-so-lucky” male counterparts and stir jealousy amongst them, BUT! would you know if he inwardly struggles with himself? even he would have issues with himself.
Remember, we all hide behind facades. Being blessed in the looks department, or owning a country does not equal to instant societal security. In fact, it might turn out to be a lifelong complication instead. Such people have other insecurities to deal with.
No one said the rich and famous had it any easier..
At least, we don’t have the paparrazi to deal with. ( :
Rants by Jean.